Life is all about perception. How you perceive other people, how they perceive you. It is this perception that allows us to form stereotypes on the day-to-day people that we come into contact with. For example, that man there could be an investment banker – a well off, high salaried man, from the car on the Forecourt to the suit, or even the cufflinks holding his pristine shirt together at the arms. Or that girl there, with the greasy hair, ripped jeans and poor grasp of English, holding a baby but could only be 19 – immediate thought? Scrounger, state benefit drain etc.

I often wonder what people think of me, then as soon as the thought crosses my mind it leaves again. I don’t care how people perceive me. Some people think I’m nice – and I always strive to be – I’m not a naturally mean person. Some people probably think I’m the scourge of the Earth – although, I’m none to sure what would have given this impression.

Anyone who reads this blog will know the stress that I’ve frustratingly vented through the medium of WordPress. Whilst that FS Audit still hasn’t happened, I did get another one today from the new Field Trainer. Would have been okay if we didn’t get a critical because of an out of spec fridge – which, might I add, had always been out of spec, and will always be out of spec because it had a frigging HOLE drilled in the top of it. But, you know, it’s all good for when it suits the company to have the machine that goes with it in use.

Then he brought up the issue of our training records. My manager and I have worked tirelessly for at least two solid months getting these records up to date and signed by everyone. And they would have passed, if for one reason. One stupid frigging reason. All the training records that is for the past year, the past quarter, everything. The reason? I’m not *technically* signed off as the Site Supervisor. So everything that I’ve done, all the work, the extra hours, the stress…When this issue was raised I just broke down into tears really. Shut myself in the office and cried. All that work just…. pointless. May as well not have put myself through it all because at the end of the day we’re no better off as a Site.

That being said, we would have done very well today if it hadn’t been for the out of spec. fridge. And I don’t want to dream too much, but the big things we need to improve upon (aside from the fridge needing a new one/getting it sorted) is mainly along the lines of paperwork… if that could be sorted, we could be on our way to an A grade… but, for the time being, I shall still dream of my B grade, because my guys are brilliant (not including a certain… someone) and they’ve really, really, pulled together for this audit. I guess we just need to keep it up and sort out what needs sorting.

And get me signed off as a Supervisor officially, because 12 GCSE’s, 5 A Levels and a 2:1 Degree doesn’t mean I competent enough. I still have a Math test to do before I can get signed off.

Deep joy. Maths is my weakest subject – but I still have a GCSE to prove that 2 + 2 = 5.